I like etiquette. I think it’s neat, if not in practice then at least to read. I like the idea of conducting oneself in a manner befitting a proper gentleman or lady. Granted, I think that etiquette is sometimes carried too far, but general courtesy is something which is seemingly rare nowadays. Etiquette is nice in that it provides a helpful guide for people in any given situation.
That is, except the subway. Well, sort of. Subways are awkward. There is definitely unspoken etiquette at play, such as seating rules or standing rules, but it tends to make things complicated for me. Everyone knows that you generally shouldn’t stare at others or make eye contact. Books and newspapers provide a nice outlet for people, because people then have somewhere to look. This doesn’t work for me. I’ve tried reading a book on the subway, and I always get too absorbed and miss my stop. If I concentrate on the T’s location and count stops, my concentration is lost to the book and having it is pointless. I can’t set a timer, because my phone does not function when underground.
So, I listen to my iPod. This works out well. I can divide my attention equally enough to be able to pay attention to the current stop and my music. It also gives me time to think. What it does not give me is somewhere to look. There are adverts in the T, but those take approximately twenty seconds to read, and I have most of them virtually memorized as is. I never know where to focus my eyes. I’m always afraid I’ll end up looking at someone and break the unspoken rule. All that I can ever really safely look at are my hands, my lap or outside the window (when we’re above ground), and I don’t exactly relish the idea of staring at my hands or the threads in my pants for an hour. I could do it, but there are other methods of torture that I’d rather experience first. I have a hierarchy of preference should I ever be faced with that sort of decision (assuming the person torturing me is polite).
I have yet to devise some sort of solution to this problem that is workable and tolerable for me, and I have the feeling that the solution is going to be to train my inner clock to just know or to learn to not get so absorbed in reading. Then again, closing my eyes and sleeping for an hour does have its appeal and provides an easy solution.
How about you? Do you run into situations like this?
Crochet! (or do something like counted cross-stitch, but that’s hard when you’re moving). Knitting is right out, because of the needles being sharp. but you can crochet an endless scarf, and it doesn’t even have to be any good. Or do dishcloths.
The crochet idea is a good one! What about something like a magazine that you aren’t particularly interested in?
I find that when I read a book or a newspaper, people always end up looking over my shoulder. It’s always awkward, and in the end, I just give up trying to read.
When I have signal, I can play with my phone, check my email, communicate with people on Twitter… Underground, I just close my eyes and pretend to sleep, and rely on the voiceover to tell me where I am.